In a merry little town is the Quartet’s Inn
With a rosey little maid serving beers and gin
and though challenged almost nightly she’ll say with a grin
that none can best her drinking at the Quartet’s Inn

SPOKEN:
a young man came up from the shingle
and challenged the barmaid to singles
they went shot for shot
till his innards did rot
and hers had just started to tingle

SUNG: For each he drank, she drank down one “ONE!
Matching drink for drink the contest had begun
but for each he drank, she drank down one “ONE!”
Til defeated he conceded that the maiden won

SPOKEN:
a scallywag looking for trouble
did challenge our maid to a double
he took one to her two
until he turned blue
and needed to burst like a bubble

For each he drank, she drank down two “TWO!”
Matching drink for drink even the strongest brew
but for each he drank, she drank down two “TWO!”
Til defeated he conceded he could not outdo

SPOKEN:
the next man thought he had the leeway
to go toe to toe in a three way
though it took half the night
our maid’s never too tight
and she won all his coin in a free way

For each he drank, she drank down three
Matching drink for drink to win his beer for free
But, for each he drank, she drank down three
Til defeated he conceded her the victory

SPOKEN:
Becca: then up stepped a handsome young buck
who wanted to try at his luck
he thought four to one odds
would win him all the broads
but instead he was royally…..

For each he drank, she drank down four “FOUR!”
Matching drink for drink even the tallest pour
but for each he drank, she drank down four “FOUR”
Til defeated he conceded as he hit the floor

(Spoken): But how did she do it you ask?
(Prompt audience): YOU ask…???
Audience: How did she do it???

(Sung): There’s a merry little secret at the Quartet’s Inn
Four rosey little maids drinking beer and gin
each the picture perfect likeness of her fellow twin
the sisters who gave name to the Quartet’s Inn